Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Where do I start...

So my brain has been on overload lately with a million and 1 things and every time I think...you need to start blogging again, I sit down and never know where to start! So, here goes nothing!

First of all, since the last time I posted I was pregnant with #3 and now he is 6 months old here is the most recent picture of my precious kiddos!

I may be a little biased but I think we had the cutest little Jesse, Woody and Buzz Lightyear for halloween this year! I could go on and on about all this preciousness but Ill spare you for today at least...

I have been reading a book called The Best Yes by Lysa Terkhurst.  Managing a home, mothering three of the cutest little munchkins in the world, being a wife to the most amazing man on the planet, being a sister, friend, daughter and leading a team of incredible champions with our AdvoCare business, life has a way of sneaking by and I often find myself as Lysa Terkhurst describes in her book as "a woman who lives with the stress of an overwhelmed schedule will often ache with the sadness of an underwhelmed soul."  I find myself committing to many good things, but that often leaves me empty and lacking the energy and passion to fight for the great things that God has given me a passion for.  As I have read this book and had many conversation with some dear friends, family and my spouse, the thing I can't put my finger on or wrap my brain around is why this seems so incredibly simple but impossible at the same time.

Some times the decisions that need to be made boil down to good things verse bad things. But often the case is deciding between two very good things, or even harder two great things. I do not claim to have many answers, but I am a perfectionist by nature (a melancholy in particular but that would take many posts to breakdown) and so my soul wrestles for a long time over making decisions because I DO NOT WANT TO FAIL.  Two years ago as I began facing my fear of failure in various different experiences, I realized the immense value in seeking wisdom.  I realized that taking risks, doing some things that were new to me brought on a greater risk of failure. Like I mentioned earlier my fear of failure had previously prevented me from doing much of anything because what if I step out and do something but fall flat on my face, or totally fail and make a fool of myself.  Anyways...I began reading books.  I started with several John Maxwell books that had nothing to do with fear actually, but more to do with how to lead and how to step out and be the BEST you. After hearing Andy Andrews speak, I began reading many of his books my favorite being The Seven Decisions (featured on Good Morning America which you can see here.) All that to say, as I began reading, I was gaining lots of wisdom, strengthening my weaknesses, gaining confidence in myself as well as realizing my strengths and passion to help other people.  I found myself actually wanting to read instead of watching TV at night, when I didn't have time to read (having 2 toddlers and an infant often make this difficult) I would download podcast, or listen to books on CD in the car, I wanted to hear more and learn more to gain knowledge and insight on how to become the best me I could be.

Ok so fast forward two years and I have still been processing the "how to" behind beginning the process of making better decisions. Part of me really felt like I needed to be hit in the head with a two by four in order to wake up and smell the roses and force myself to seek wisdom.  After walking through hard life situations with many friends who have landed in places they never dreamed were possible I have even stronger conviction in the truth behind Andy Stanley's book Principle of the Path "direction, not intention, determines your destination."  He also says "Our problem stems from the fact that we are not on a truth quest, That is, we don't wake up every morning with a burning desire to know what's true, what's right, what's honorable. We are on a happiness quest, we want to be-as in feel- happy. And our quest for happiness often trumps our appreciation for and pursuit of what is true."

My challenge today would be to take time to evaluate where you REALLY are in life. Look at your marriage, how you are parenting/ disciplining/ raising your children, your finances and the choices you make every day of where you're spending your money.  Andy Stanley in Principle of the Path says "Wouldn't it be great if there were a yellow brick road to wherever it is that you want to go in life..to a marriage you want to come home to...better financial security?..If that were the case, you would stop looking for solutions to problems, and you would start looking for the right path...There is no fix for being lost. To get from where we don't want to be to where we do want to be requires two things: time and change of direction. There isn't a quick fix."

So be honest and really evaluate where you are. Where the path you are on is going to lead you. I would love to post soon about something Lysa Terkhurst book has taught me on chasing down decisions you make so we will save that, but there is power in taking a really good inventory of your life. I am frequently challenged and so I challenge you to take a good hard look and identify the things in your life that are there that you DONT WANT anymore, and then things you don't currently have that you do want.